I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
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