i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
