margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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