I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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