Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
