i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I need help removing her.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
