walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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