ya dads aren't the best wingmen
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got so high we made milksteak
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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