I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
