do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
