Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
