Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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