FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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