I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
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