I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
