I think my vagina is haunted
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize