your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
