We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
