Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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