my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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