somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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