You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
