I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
