My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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