used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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