I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
You made out with two different species that night
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Randomize
