I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
