even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Randomize
