garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
