That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
His hands were made for my vagina.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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