chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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