Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
it was like eating out sand paper
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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