fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
