so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
