I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
