I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Randomize
