Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
