They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
