whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
