He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
