one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'm sobbing to NWA
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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