If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
