I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
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