I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Locals Wish Tourists Would Stop Doing These 27 Things
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.