I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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