He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
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