Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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