It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize