He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
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I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
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He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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