No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
